Let’s talk about Sex with Stephanie Smith

Sex Talk with Shiloh Hobby A-Z From SkitzoKitty in Palm Desert.... E.. for EROTICA!

Stephanie Smith
Embark on a titillating journey through the alluring landscapes of erotica as we, Stephanie Smith and special guest Shiloh Hobby, peel back the layers of this intimate genre. With a playful yet insightful chat live from Schizo Kitty in Palm Desert, we unearth the delicate intricacies that make erotica an art form that captivates the senses and stirs the soul, rather than simply explicit material. Our discussion dances around the historical context of sexual freedom, the impact of erotica on personal relationships, and how the likes of Marie Hall's "Kingdom Series" charmingly twist the tales of 'bad guys' in fairy tales, painting them in a desirous light.

This week's conversation takes a deep yet spirited look at how erotica can be a gateway to enhanced intimacy, delighting both individuals and couples, irrespective of their sexual appetite. Shiloh and I celebrate the notion of reading as a couple, promoting it as a conduit to a more profound and shared erotic exploration. By the end of our exchange, you'll find yourself considering how erotica might play a role in your own life - be it as a solitary pleasure or a shared adventure - and how storytelling in the bedroom can be as tantalizing as the act itself. Join us for a dialogue that promises an educational foray into the enticing world of erotica, with a dash of fairy tale whimsy sprinkled throughout.

12/30/23

Support the show

https://linktr.ee/TheGilfsDen

Thank you for joining me on today's podcast. I intend the information provided may have resonated with you today. If so, please like- follow and subscribe, I would love if you would write a review, send me a message on what topic you would like me to cover on the show and feel free to check out ALL my other social media (link is EVERYWHERE)! Come back for more fun and learning! Thank you for ALL the support!


Love UR G

#letstalkaboutsexwithstephaniesmith #letstalkaboutsex #womenshealth #menshealth #vaginalhealth #prostatehealth #sexualhealthmaven #fearlesseducator #sexualempowerment #humansexuality #breakingbarriers #savvysexuality #sexaficionado #sexualwellness #avibeadaykeepsthedoctoraway #vibrationplates #stephaniesmith #sexualhealth #loveandrelationships #thejoysofmasturbation #sexandaging #communicationinthebedroom #tabootopics #sexandmentalhealth #sex #lowlibido #highlibido #buzzsproutpodcasts #podbean #iheartradiopodcasts #spotifypodcasts #applepodcasts #googlepodcasts #podcast #podcasts #newpodcasts #skydufaux #becomingsuperhuman #DrTina #sexwithoutshame #thegilfsden #gilfden

Let’s talk about sex with- Stephanie Smith assumes no responsibility or any errors or omissions in the content of this site. Thoughts and opinions expressed belong solely to ME and is not intended to do harm to any individual. BUT- it is the TRUTH so WAKE UP! The information contained in this site is provided on an "...

Speaker 1:

intro. Here we are, we are live. Hello, welcome to sex talk A to Z with Shiloh and Stephanie. Hello, shiloh.

Speaker 2:

Hi Stephanie, how are you today?

Speaker 1:

I am great because we are doing A to Z and today we're doing E for erotica. I love erotica, so fun to talk about. So hello, our listeners, we really appreciate you being here and as we guide you on this little weekly journey that we're on. Right, it's our weekly little journey. No topic is too taboo or ever will let. Her will hold holds, a new discovery, sorry, we're broadcasting live. Yes, right in the heart of desire and discovery here at Schizo Kitty in Palm Desert, california.

Speaker 1:

Today, as every week, we've got something special lined up for you. Not only are we diving into the delicious depths of sex and sensuality, but we're also giving away a gift basket full of goodies each week. That is right, yes, each week. Want to get your hands on it? Well, you make sure that you download the entry form available. There's a link in our comments. It's not a download, it just takes you right to the raffle form, fill it out, complete. It drops it back into us. It's basically giving you authorization that we're going to do some emails to you, maybe once a month, and make sure that you make sure you tune in and get this done before 7 am on Monday morning. That list will be done and then the drawing will be every Tuesday in the middle of our podcast.

Speaker 1:

We're going to do a wheel of names. Shiloh's put that together. Thank you so much, shiloh. So we're going to do a wheel of names and we'll pull that directly from our podcast each week. So don't forget to put your entry in and remember that all names are gathered, are going to be on the show, so everyone's name there.

Speaker 1:

If you have a little issue, let us know, but we want you to be part of our program here, and if you can't join us live, there's no worries. You can catch our replays either in our live section on any of our of the platforms for let's talk about sex with me, stephanie Smith, or you can also go and check our podcast that will come out about a week-ish later. That's what I'm doing, so no big format on that, but otherwise, please subscribe, like and follow. Leave us a comment, dm me. I would love it and I get for those who say oh, I can't do that because of someone will know, but typically you're just learning here, so I'm not really sure why you can't be part of our little learning tool that we're teaching. So anyway, my personal opinion. What do you think?

Speaker 2:

Absolutely, and you know, just back to that form real quick. Y'all can put in otherwise known as name if you would like to just make sure that you have your name, like your name on there in case you win. So if you just want to do like you know, sassy Kitty, aka. You know, you're really that way, you know, that way, you know we can throw that on the wheel instead. I mean that would be super fun to have your AKS, that would be fun. I mean just to clarify, stephanie, you said 7 am on Monday. Is that 7 am Pacific time?

Speaker 1:

Oh, yes, thank you very much. It is my time Usually always, because most of the people that work with me live in California and Pacific standard time. So, yes, 7am, and I'll kind of post that maybe do a little something on Sunday. We'll see to remind you, but not really worried about it because it's your loss of not entering our raffle for weekly free. A free gift. It's amazing we have like products to look at.

Speaker 1:

Yes, and I forgot to bring it out. Today I'm going to post a basket. I'm going to post it a little real about it on, we'll do a little live about it myself and one of the gals from here. So, yes, I will do that with all the little goodies. I'll do a little basket opener of like, all the little goodies. So that sounds fun. Good, thank you for that, and I'm going to take off my clinky bracelet because it's clinking.

Speaker 1:

All right, let's talk about erotica. And what is it? Let's just give everyone a little definition. So it's a genri of literature, art or media that explicitly designed to arouse sexual desire. It focuses on the sensual rather than the graphic and explicit depiction of sexual acts. Erotica aims to stimulate the imagination of the audience with romantic or sexual scenarios, with romantic or sexual scenarios often emphasizing a physical and emotional connection between characters. It can be expressed through various media, including books, film, photography and painting, and one of the most known for everyone will know, fifty Shades of Grey, is erotica. But his books are erotic, it is a form of erotica, and there's all. It's a variation. So remember anything in the sex industry, there's a variation. So that's why this A to Z is just one variation, because there's so many variations. So, but yes, you do your little eyebrow, nose stir and tell us what that means.

Speaker 2:

Oh, you know, I mean, you know, as you said, erotica covers a lot. And you know, I mean Fifty Shades is a great example of erotica. I mean it really kind of it really brought it to the forefront, right. I mean you know everybody, you know, just got.

Speaker 1:

That was a pretty hot and heavy movie. You're going to not believe me, but I haven't seen it. I haven't watched one of them. It wasn't my thing. No, I did have you read it. I did read a few of them, and not the books where I heard better, and that's the reason why I went to the books. That's what I was told. Now, of course, I did see parts and bits and pieces of the movie as it was, you know, playing in trailers. Super beautiful and sexy and erotic. It's just, you know, again, it's just like porn.

Speaker 1:

People get an idea that that's what it's like all the time and that's not really what life is about. This is playtime. That's why you play, you know. So, yeah, that's how I believe it. I mean, if someone thinks that erotica happens on a daily basis, I would probably. It's not going to happen. I mean, maybe if the for those people who are both into it, but it's probably not Um, I think it loses, loses its. You know, it's fun and so it's not something that's done like that. But please go on and tell us what other, what other authors you think are better than the 50 Shade of Grays, or Comparison, or whatever you want to say.

Speaker 2:

And I did bring out a few of my favorite authors because you know, I'm a, I'm kind of a bit I'm a book nerd, so I do have have.

Speaker 1:

I do have a bookcase of erotica.

Speaker 2:

Um, I mean, I like, I mean I prefer, you know, and I mean this is a reference thing. You know, everybody has their own preference when it comes to erotica, whether you want to watch pornography or you want to read about it, you know, I mean, it's really your choice. But erotica, you know, as you mentioned, you know it can be, you know, written, so you mentioned, you know it can be written, so you know, and not to down 50 shades, I really don't want to down it. I think that it was great for getting erotica out into the mainstream.

Speaker 2:

One thing that I want to caution everyone when you're reading erotica and when you're reading the different scenes that you may want to reproduce, do a little research and make sure you're getting the right information and that you're doing the different scenes that you may want to reproduce. Do a little research and make sure you're getting the right information and that you're doing it correctly. You know, I want to throw that caution out there because you know this is somebody's fantasy that they're putting in their head and they may not be putting information out there that is actually, you know, safe, you know. So just make sure you're doing your research when you're trying a new thing.

Speaker 1:

So yeah, and I think that's a good point because they're not going to put in all the precautions inside of their erotica journal. So that is very good point that you should bring. That. That's a very valid I mean amazing Good point, absolutely. And I mean because I think that I mean I have a lot of erotica books and a lot of times people just you know and you think out loud you're like, oh, that could go wrong or that, but that's only because I've played enough. But those who haven't played enough or don't know wouldn't know that. So that's very good.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, exactly, I mean, I think that's a big point. So I mean, with any erotica, just remember it's fantasy, and researching to make sure that you're doing it correctly is important.

Speaker 1:

So I, oh, I wanted to show our anything like here's my tequila bottle. This is a phallic tequila bottle. It resembles a penis at the tip and this was actually built like um, I used to find these. I found this. It's called la rosa reposada. That is so cool, right? So I love it. It's tequila reposada. Reposada a some brusso. Anyway, I love it, and I know you have one too.

Speaker 2:

I do too. Yes, this is my favorite one. I actually um, when I was, when I was doing pure romance parties, I actually got this from one of my hostesses. So this little, this little gentleman here, we're gonna call him a gentleman because when you lift up his little love it disappears.

Speaker 1:

Oh, I love it, I love it next to me.

Speaker 2:

I just love the things that people find I love it.

Speaker 1:

I love it, and just to bring out more, I mean, there's plenty of books out there, and entry is a new one as well for the people I did grab some books off of my, off of my um, in case you know.

Speaker 2:

Anybody wanted some recommendations on authors, so one that I found that she's pretty popular. Sylvia Day kind of follows with that. She has the Beard to you series. You can't really tell.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, it's a delight, because it's hard to see what is it called?

Speaker 2:

So this is Bear to you. It is by Sylvia Day and very popular series and very good. It kind of follows, I feel like it kind of follows like that Fifty Shades genre a little bit. So if you like Fifty Shades, you'll probably like Bear to you, would probably like Baird to you If you want something a little bit more BDSM than Fifty Shades not as vanilla, because Fifty Shades is kind of vanilla sort of Is it, I don't know?

Speaker 2:

Once upon a time one of our favorite authors, who you might not think of as an erotica author because she delved into the fantasy world of vampires. I'm talking about ann rice, oh, really ann rice. Back in the 90s she wrote the sleeping beauty series and this is the first one. It is well, it was a trilogy and then actually a couple years ago, um, they brought out a fourth one. So, um, I just want to say that one.

Speaker 2:

There's erotic stories, erotic. This is a book. This is a book and actually so this is the claiming of sleeping beauty, it's sleeping beauty trilogy and essentially it is what happened to Sleeping Beauty when the prince woke her up and how he woke her up. And I just want to say, unlike Fifty Shades, where you wait until chapter five for the juicy stuff, page two. And it's only page two because the first page, you know, has that. Let me see, let me open this up for you real quick to show you, because the first page has this big, huge, you know thing that blocks it off, so it only has as much words. So I just want you to know, all the juicy stuff starts right here.

Speaker 1:

Wow.

Speaker 2:

Oh yeah.

Speaker 1:

Nice.

Speaker 2:

It's crazy. Another fun one that I found this is a collection of stories, so these are kind of, you know, along that whole fairy tale. I don't know why. Somehow I was grabbing out fairy tales I guess out of my, out of my bookcase here when I was grabbing some. But this is a kingdom series collection and it is by marie hall and this has a few different, um a few different stories. This one actually has her Mad Hatter, gerard's Beauty and Red and her Wolf.

Speaker 2:

So actually the bad guys in the fairy tales, oh fun.

Speaker 1:

And that's fun because there's a lot of people that like all different types of fairy tales or erotic.

Speaker 2:

That adds to that, those Disney films, I mean, they're full of little innuendos, so to speak. So, yeah, I think it's just natural that somebody decided that they needed to go ahead and throw out some erotica books on there too. Um, another favorite author that I have here is tara misu. Sorry, all this. Yeah, tara Misu, this one's the training, just other bondage.

Speaker 1:

I'll put a list in the comments of some of the books. You can send me a list.

Speaker 2:

I was just going to add. One of the nice things that I've seen lately when going shopping for books and looking for erotica is and stores are. You know bookstores are actually starting to break out the erotica so it's not necessarily mixed in with the romance so they're easier to find. So you know when you're going. I mean it's like looking for any other book. You know trial and error, but there are a lot of really popular authors out there that will definitely will add that list for you.

Speaker 1:

Cool, and then let's move on to. You know from the erotica where they can go and get it and, of course, any other bookstore that you can get it. There's a lot. That's why I was showing the book that we have here at Schizo Kitty. But I want to know this Is erotica only for people who have high drives, high sex drives.

Speaker 1:

Oh, erotica is for everybody, so you mean, if I just want sex once a month, yeah, if I just want sex once a month, I mean I can still be into erotica, absolutely, thank you. I think we have a lot of misconceptions, and so you know, breaking down some of these things about you know, and it's not dirty and it's not nasty, it's anything you want to make it. Um, you can do as much or as little as you want. Um, it doesn't have to be as crazy as 50 shades of gray it can be, as it can be super simple.

Speaker 2:

I mean some people like the Harlequin romances the days gone by, you know to to date ourselves a little bit. But I mean you know that's a, you know, romance books are, you know, a mild form of erotica? Yes, they are. They usually have a good sex scene in there, once, just a couple. You know it's more on the vanilla side, but it's still, you know, it's still a little bit of erotica, A little touch More vanilla, but a little touch yeah.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, okay, so it's not. It can be for anybody. Um and um. Is it more of a modern phenomena than is it just more? No exactly it's. It's in the day they had a lot of phallic symbols, a lot of fish with penises. I mean we did medieval in school and it's crazy. The Cleopatra I mean she was big into all that too. Right yeah, crazy yeah.

Speaker 2:

I actually just watched a documentary and I don't know the name of it, so don't ask me that, but I did watch a little documentary that I found that you know just kind of talked about. You know, back in medieval times they were way more open about sex than you know we are now. It's kind of funny, you know, like just how way more about over over the years.

Speaker 2:

You know, in terms of sexuality, because back then you know they were talking about how they talk about, they do funny, they do sexy jokes and very inappropriate jokes and make up poems and such. You know and share them at dinner and banquets and you know whatever Like it's common dinner time stories. You know. So definitely, you know we've definitely progressed towards the shameful part which you know just seems kind of backwards. I mean, you know, when you think about, you know sexuality, sexuality, throughout history. I mean easter used to be the festival of fertility. It was a fertility festival everyone having fun and sex love it in the church and then the church.

Speaker 2:

well, and it just makes sense. Because spring, you know it's fertile, everything is, you know everybody, all the animals are coming out and meeting and you know it's just springtime of fertility, you know planting and whatnot. So you know that used to be what it was. The church came in and actually made it not as sexy. So, fun fact, some fun things around that, but not to digress from our erotica conversation, yes, and you know it is.

Speaker 1:

I mean, let's just be clear, sex is better without shame. It is way better and if you can get over and work through that, it would be really good. You know to do that for yourself and for your partner, um, and then bring in some of this play stuff like erotica or dildos, like we've talked about learning about your clit, that we've talked about all the different things, integrating that stuff, stuff, because you become more adverse, you've learned more things and you now know that it is not shameful to understand your clit, to bring in a dildo, talk about erotica with your partner it's very fun. And to read stories together and even just do fantasy stories as part of your playtime super fun. I love that kind of stuff. So I think that for more people it does, it makes it fun and you don't have to. It's not even about doing the things that are inside that book. It's just about reading it sometimes and just imagining it together and then playing and having a little role going or playful, whatever, however it ends up.

Speaker 1:

But um can go all different kinds of ways. Oh, fun, fun kind of way. So, yeah, yeah, anyway, what else do we want to tell them? We have? We showed them some books. Um, you know, know it's, they understand it's. You know film? It's more of a creative, artistic approach and emotional approach and not more of the act of just bam bam penis vagina entry Boom.

Speaker 2:

Right, you know erotica is more. You know it really does focus on that fantasy part. So I mean you know that's where you know researching and making sure, like if you're trying to copy something, you know just research it a little bit and make sure you're doing it safely, because you know, when you're thinking about fantasy, I mean you can do anything when you write something. That you know when something is written, I mean it's, you know, it doesn't necessarily mean that it actually makes sense in the moment. So you know, just remember, you know it is a fantasy. Yeah, exactly, and it's not a shameful thing.

Speaker 1:

No, not a shameful thing at all. No, there is no shame in sex and you could also go and check out the full. We have a podcast with Dr Tina Shermer Sellers Sex is better without shame. She wrote a book about it. She talks a lot about that. I did a podcast with her. We're going to have her back on the show. But, bottom line, go check out all of her stuff. It is better without shame and if you can work through some of that trauma, it's really critical. It can be really beneficial for you, your partner and, honestly, for people around you. When you are a little bit more comfortable with that part of yourself, it just changes a lot of other things about you and it makes you just. It just changes. So being a little bit more yeah.

Speaker 2:

Because you know, and it's important to know, what you want. There's nothing wrong with knowing what you want and what you like and asking for what you like. Actually asking me what you like is kind of sexy.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and people and men want to help. If you're in a male, your partner, whoever it is, whatever type of partner you have, that partner wants to make sure that they satisfy you. That is 100% true. We want to set, we want to. We are built to satisfy our partners. That's what we're built to do. So we'll get out there and, um, take a look at our link, fill out the raffle. If you want to pop in, do an order at schizo kitty, come in, mention the podcast, sex talk a to Z with Shiloh and Steph, and you could get a little free toy here, or a little not toy, but a free item. They have little giveaways, so, but you have to mention the show if you come in. All right, and all right. Well, that's it. What else do we want to talk about? My love? What's next week?

Speaker 2:

We've got F for Next week we said f is for why, why I was skipping and why I wasn't thinking about that fellatio, yes, and because it is, it is hot.

Speaker 1:

Fellatio is so intricate, you know, and everyone's oh, what's the right way when, wrong way? And and we're going to explain a lot of different things Cause I, oh, we have a big big thing going on in the background. Sorry, can you hear that, did you?

Speaker 1:

hear it a little bit, but oh, okay, that's good that it doesn't come through. Okay, week, fellatio, come back for more. We're going to do another raffle each week. So keep coming back, keep learning more. And let me do my final little. I'm going to do my little ending because this goes into a podcast, so I like to kind of do a close, so, anyway.

Speaker 1:

So that's, we've reached the end of sex talk A to Z with Shiloh and Stephanie at Schizo Kitty in Palm Desert, california. It has been an absolute pleasure to be here today. We've laughed, we've learned and hopefully, we've lit a spark that'll keep you glowing until we meet again. So don't forget, if you've missed any part of today's live show, find us in the live section or catch up from the podcast platform a week or so later. Your feedback is our fuel. So subscribe, like, follow and drop us a line, and that's what I'm doing today because I'm tired, because I went to Joe Coy on the weekend and we laughed and we laughed and we laughed and belly laughed and belly laughed. So, joe, we did laugh all weekend and I've still been laughing. So thank you, thank you for the laughs. And I did reach out to him and he reached back. So thank you, joe. I do hope that you like and follow.

Speaker 1:

Let's Talk About Sex with Stephanie Smith and sex talk A to Z with Shiloh hobby Every Tuesday, live 11 am Pacific standard time at schizo kitty palm deserts. So thanks for joining me, shiloh, until next time, sweetie, thanks for having me. Bye everybody, thanks, thanks for being on the show and let's have and having fun with me each week. Okay, my stream. There we go.

People on this episode